The Power of Internal Dialogue

Positive Self -Talk Doesn't Weaken Performance ---- It Enhances It

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Lando Norris is one of the fastest drivers in F1 today. Lewis Hamilton is the greatest F1 driver of all time. Whatever mental and physical tools they rely on have clearly worked, as F1 is one of the most selective and unforgiving sports on the planet where only 20 drivers can compete at the highest level.

Years ago, I was lucky to have dinner with Tiger Woods (my father knew him) and he said something that stuck with me: after years of being asked the same questions by the media, he learned to say nothing in a lot of words.

I think about that often when I hear athletes speak publicly. Most of the time, their words seem guarded—and who can blame them? Vulnerability can't feel safe in front of millions.

That’s why I pay attention when we get rare, unscripted radio, mic'd, or interview moments that offer glimpses into their psyches.

F1 is psychology at full throttle. When victories are measured in thousandths of a second, the mental pressure is unrelenting.

Recently, Norris and Hamilton let their guards down just a little. What they said struck me—not as a critique, but as an invitation to explore something we all wrestle with: how we talk to ourselves when the stakes are high.

Athletes don't owe us transparency about what they're really feeling and I believe we should celebrate --- rather than judge and criticise -- when they do share authentically.

One of my favorite tennis players–turned–podcaster, Andy Roddick, often jokes about how much it bugs him that everyone thinks they’re sports experts. As he puts it, he’d never walk into a doctor’s office and tell them how to do surgery—so why do so many people feel qualified to coach professional athletes from their couches?

It’s a totally valid point.

So while I am commenting from my "couch" and am not qualified to tell anyone how to drive an F1 car or play any sport professionally, I hope I can offer insight into the psychology of sport as a psychotherapist who works with human behavior.

At the Saudi Arabian Grand Prix, after being consistently quick all weekend and looking like a contender for pole position, Lando crashed in Q3 and said over the radio, “fucking idiot.” Lando is known for being hard on himself, but this felt especially self-critical.

Before qualifying, Hamilton sounded despondent and reflected: “Normally Saturday goes backwards, but there’s not a lot backwards for me to go.” Then added, “I’m just trying to see if I can get into the top 10.”

Hearing two of the most talented drivers speak so harshly about themselves broke my heart. These are men who pour everything they have into every race --- subjecting their bodies to a level of strain most of us can't even imagine.

It also made me consider something deeper: how much does negative self-talk hold us back—and by contrast, how much farther can positive self-talk take us?

After Lando's crash, former racing driver Alex Brundle commented that he had "no idea how [drivers] block it out. Absolutely none. I’d be in pieces trying to drive in Formula One.” 

The good news is that in the field of performance psychology, we do know our "cognitive framing" -- or our internal dialogue -- plays a critical role in athletic achievement, allowing athletes to focus on the present and future, not the past.

And it’s not just theory - it’s based on scientific research.

We know that the harsh drill sergeant who replays every mistake and demands perfection in the name of "motivation" doesn’t actually get the best out of us. 

The problem is, not everyone knows or believes this yet.

Resistance to Positive Self-Talk

Plenty of people believe their negative self-talk fuels their intensity -- that positive self-talk means going easy, making excuses - the age-old-taboo that positive thinking is "going soft".

In a different interview for Beyond the Grid last season, Lando said his "mentality [of putting myself down, blaming myself]—that’s just how I work. That’s how I get the most out of myself. That’s why I’m in Formula One now.”

But just because something feels familiar -- or has "worked" before -- doesn't mean it's the most effective way to get the best out of yourself.

As therapists, we often face the challenge of respecting an athlete’s autonomy in how they motivate themselves—while also inviting them to consider that the research is clear: positive self-talk doesn’t just help, it enhances performance at the highest levels.

I have had many athletes tell me how grateful they feel to have had a "tough" parent. They say it’s what pushed them, got them out of bed to practices, made them buckle down and take their sport seriously...

But here’s what’s so striking: the science doesn’t actually back that up. Research tells us we don’t need harshness to unlock potential; toughness isn’t what builds greatness—support and belief do. Sometimes I encourage my clients to consider that maybe they are so accomplished in spite of their parents' or coaches' tough and harsh moments and instead, it was actually the kinder, compassionate moments that were the most helpful.

We can never know who they might’ve become as athletes if they’d been treated with only positive encouragement instead of harsher pressure because once a path is lived, the alternate one disappears -- or alternately stated, we can never disprove something that has already happened... but the science suggests we don't need the harsh critic.

Why Does Positive Self-Talk Work? 

Here's the short version: your thoughts have real physiological consequences.

Emotions like fear, stress, and self-doubt trigger our stress responses, flooding our bodies with adrenaline and cortisol. These cause our bodies to tighten, our reflexes to brace, and we lose clarity and focus — exactly what you don’t want to happen behind the wheel of an F1 car -- where tension slows reaction time when every thousandth of a second matters.

Positive, affirming thoughts, on the other hand, can trigger the release of dopamine, serotonin, norepinephrine, and endorphins—neuro-chemicals linked to confidence, focus, and emotional control. These shifts don’t just change how you feel—they change how you move, your reflex time, your coordination, and what you’re capable of under pressure.

Self-talk isn’t just abstract and intangible. It’s a tool that affects your body's neurochemistry.

Evidence in Support of Positive Self-Talk

James Hardy, a Professor in Sport and Exercise Science at Bangor University, Wales, did extensive research on self-talk and athletic performance. He published an article in the Journal of Psychology of Sport and Exercise (2006) that discussed how overwhelming evidence showed that the way athletes speak to themselves—whether encouraging or critical—affected everything from confidence to motor skill execution. Positive self-talk was linked to improved athletic performance across a variety of sports. Research by Tod, Hardy, and Oliver (2011) further supported this and demonstrated that instructional and motivational self-talk significantly improved motor task performance. Similarly, Hatzigeorgiadis et al. (2011) conducted a systematic review that found consistent benefits of positive self-talk across multiple sports disciplines, with effects seen in strength, endurance, fine motor tasks, and precision-based skills.

This growing body of research showing that reframing internal dialogue to positive self-talk can enhance confidence, reduce anxiety, and boost focus during high-pressure moments.

Delusional Optimism in the NBA: A Unique Style of Positive Self-Talk

The first time I heard the phrase "delusional optimism" was from coach and former commentator Jeff Van Gundy when he was calling a Warriors game and talking about Steph Curry. Curry was having a rare "off night"— his usual superhero powers were just a little out of sync—and the Warriors were down by one or two points with just seconds left. During a timeout, Van Gundy said there was no doubt in his mind that Curry was in the huddle saying, “I want to take the shot.”

Sure enough, Draymond Green inbounded the ball to Curry. Curry launched a three-pointer—nothing but net. Warriors win.

Van Gundy explained with wonderment how these players have a delusional optimism -- they aren't thinking about the shots they've missed. They're thinking "Give me the ball -- I've got this."

For Curry, Durant, LeBron, Anthony Edwards, Luca, Brunson, Giannis -- big names in basketball right now --- when the moment comes, they believe --- rationally or irrationally -- that they want to take that winning shot. They aren't thinking " I missed that last shot, maybe I shouldn't take this one".

That’s delusional optimism—and it’s one of the things that separates elite performers from the rest of us.

Most of us mere mortals would be thinking "my shot has felt a little off tonight. Maybe LeBron should take it, not me".

Curry has trained himself to tune out that negative inner voice. He doesn’t identify with the misses—he identifies as the player who makes the game-winning shot.

That’s not arrogance—it’s identity.

He has probably imagined making a game-winning shot more times than he can count since he was little. That's who he is.

Hamilton has been open that he is not feeling comfortable in his Ferrari -- yet. Totally understandable.

But what if Hamilton could apply Curry's delusional optimism to his driving?

I'm not pretending to know how to drive an F1 car. But maybe for Hamilton, delusional optimism would be accepting that even though he isn't totally comfortable in the Ferrari and qualifying doesn't go well, he decides: "I'm going to finish strong today because I know this car is capable of getting there and I've got this." Then, everything in his language, his physicality -- every cell in his being -- his identity -- embodies that belief.

Of course, delusional optimism in Formula 1 is more complicated than in basketball. Steph Curry controls his shot. Lewis Hamilton, on the other hand, faces countless variables outside his control—his car’s pace relative to Red Bull or McLaren, unpredictable weather, or another driver’s mistake. But what he can control is his mindset. If he applies the lens of delusional optimism when he gets into the car—believing he can extract the absolute maximum from himself and his car. That sets the tone for everything that follows. And in a sport where so much is out of his hands, this belief gives him the best possible chance to deliver his best performance.

Identity and Performance

In his book Atomic Habits, author James Clear explains that true behavior change is more likely to stick when it becomes part of your identity. It’s one thing to say, “I’m trying to quit smoking.” It’s another to say, “I’m not a smoker.” One is a struggle. The other is a self-concept.

The same applies to elite athletes. If you believe you're a finisher, a fighter, a champion—you act accordingly. If you believe you're inconsistent, not quite good enough, a racing driver who only hopes to make 10th place, those patterns will find their way into your performance.

Carol S. Dweck's 2006 book on Mindset talked about studies on self-referential thinking and performance and showed that our beliefs about ourselves directly influence motivation, resilience, and long-term achievement. A growth mindset—the belief that ability can be developed—leads to greater perseverance and better outcomes.

In psychology, we also talk about this through the lens of Narrative Therapy. It focuses on the stories we tell ourselves—often shaped early in life—that define how we see ourselves and what we believe we’re capable of. Sometimes those stories serve us. But most times, they limit us—and we have to learn how to let go of them in order to grow.

David Coulthard, former F1 driver and runner-up to the World Championship in 2001, said there is no room in an F1 driver's mind for the thought "Don't crash." Hall of Fame wide receiver Jerry Rice — considered by many to be the greatest wide receiver of all time — said "the worst thing a receiver can do is be afraid of dropping the ball." These kinds of negative thinking patterns end up becoming self-fulfilling prophecies because the mind is so powerful.

Author and sports psychologist Gary Mack wrote about athletes with the winning mentality and how Tiger Woods believed he was going to win every tournament he competed in. Mohammed Ali was going to win every fight he entered. Some of the greatest athletes ever including Willy Mays, Bobby Jones, Nolan Ryan, Lou Gehrig, Jack Nicklaus all believed they could win every competition (or strike out every batter, hit a home run, sink every put...).

How Change Happens

So how do you change your inner self-talk?

Here’s a metaphor: Imagine you’ve been driving a winding two-mile road for years to get between two houses. It’s familiar. It’s an efficient road because it’s already paved. But now, with new information, you realize you could build a half-mile road straight from one house to the other—faster, smoother, safer. The only catch? You'd have to clear some trees first.

That’s the work. The science shows it's possible. That’s the mental rewiring.

With practice and intention, people can shift their thought patterns and behaviors—even those that feel deeply ingrained—toward more positive and productive directions. Research in neuroplasticity has shown that the brain is capable of forming new neural pathways throughout life (Draganski et al., 2006; Doidge, 2007). But we have to want to change and we have to believe in the process of why we are changing.

Getting Out of Our Own Way

Lewis Hamilton said in his MasterClass,“We get in our own way sometimes”. As a therapist, I see just how true that is—especially when our inner voice becomes our biggest obstacle. This voice can be changed, even if it doesn’t feel that way at first.

Positive self-talk doesn’t just help us perform better —a bonus is it also helps us feel better. Watching Steph Curry, you don’t just see skill—you see joy. That joy also elevates his game and in our own lives, positive self-talk creates space for that same kind of joy.

The more we practice self-compassion and positive self-talk, the more room we have for growth, because when we change the way we talk to ourselves, we expand what is possible.

It may take some work to clear the trees in our way—but what we gain is a clearer, brighter path forward.

Side Note: LANDO NORRIS IN THE NEWS